11.04.2009

Pickles and Prose

Dear Reader,


It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a mother in possession of three children, must be in want of a nap.

I must confess to be reading my favorite book for the umpteenth time. Can you, by chance, guess what it might be?

Every time I do this, two things happen. 1.) I do a lot of thinking. 2.) I start dropping terms like, "I'm in no humor at present to give consequence to young ladies who are slighted by other men!" into normal conversation. Which, let me tell you, is rather difficult. I connect with this book. It is a book about people. I am a people-watcher. It is a book about family. My family is my life. It is a book about houses. I have to clean one of those. OK, the last one wasn't a great connection, but still. I love this book. It is a book about life lessons and settling scores.

Here are the life lessons my children learned this week. Sanity and Insanity are constantly in the throes of battle around here due to these learning experiences.


1.) Pip learned to roll over. Saying goodbye to the days of an immobile baby = Insanity -1

2.) Pip learned to drop toys on the floor and expect someone to pick them up again. More messes to clean up and more distractions from normal household tasks/activities = Insanity - 2

3.) Pip learned teething is a good reason for refusing to sleep or be content. Dealing with a crabby baby = Insanity - 1


4.) Pip learned to love blowing spit bubbles. Laughing at cute baby antics = Sanity - 1

5.) T-boy learned to adore my scrap-booking tool kit. Fruitlessly searching for a mini hammer for an hour, giving up in favor for a full-size one, whacking thumb = Insanity - 3

6.) T-boy learned to use the phrase, "Why is it always ME?" when he's told to do something. Getting mad and saying son may NEVER spend time with the uncle who taught him that sentence, knowing this is an idle threat - Insanity - 2

7.) T-boy learned to refuse to play with his sister. He is in no humor at present to give consequence to young ladies who are slighted by other men. Ha! [insert satisfied smirk] Not perfect, but acceptable. Settling constant fights involving a screeching five-year-old and an indignant three-year-old = Insanity - 1


8.) T-boy learned a tiny warhorse and knight is a very interesting toy. Preschooler being occupied for at least an hour every day = Sanity - 1


  9.) Bee learned that her favorite game is 'The Princess and the pea'. Having to trip over piles of bedding, remaking all the beds every five minutes = Insanity - 2


10.) Bee learned how to scrub a toilet. Having someone else do this chore, not feeling one bit guilty (because she thinks it's fun) = Sanity - 2


The Score, as it stands today: Insanity - 12 Sanity - 4


I'm thinking Sanity better beef it up a little this week, [Crazy laughter] make that, a lot. See, all that excess thinking gets me two things, a headache and an all-too-sobering perspective of my life. And what does using antiquated terminology get me? A lot of strange looks and odd knowing smiles, a husband who wishes he had somewhere else to be and a quickly decreasing blog audience. Why do I do this to myself? Like I said, I love this book.


And truly my life is pretty good too. Insanity isn't so bad.

Love,
Proudly Pickled in NE

14 comments:

  1. Love this post - didn't lose a reader here. ;) So...am I the only one who hasn't figured out what book you're talking about?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nope..I don't know what book it is either.

    I stumbled upon your blog and think you are hilarious and really first rate at this blogging thing!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Well I know what the book is, since it happens to be one of my all time favorites, and I was just wishing it had been long enough that I could read it again. It isn't a book that very many people read, unless you are into antiquities with 200 year old vocabulary.
    Oh...you want to know what the book is? Pride and Prejudice, by Jane Austin.

    ReplyDelete
  4. of course I knew it had to be your fav of favs Jane Austins' P & P ...but I have an edge being your Ma.
    Lovelovelove this post....but then since I am already hungry for a grandkiddleywink fix....the darling pix help.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I wasn't certain on the book, but P&P was my reactive thought. We never did watch the long sAga of a movie together, did we? When, now, will we ever get around to that?
    On a different note entirely, I have spread the news about your most splendiforous new blog and sincerely hope your readership spreads far and wide and leads you into grand ventures that require book signings......at which time I will say that I Knew You When.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Good morning,
    I can see your husbands side of the family in that last picture of Bee. That's a first for me.
    Hugs, Auntie Lu

    ReplyDelete
  7. I knew the book too, because I've heard you say it was your favorite. Can you believe I've never read it? I do think I'll have to put it on my list for next year when my life calms down again

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
    (crazy laughter)

    I'm loving Brandie's comment up there about your blog! I will be right there beside her saying "yes, that's my niece"....
    Thanks for keeping it "real"
    :)
    Hugs!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Sorry...I was clueless on the book...but read above comments. Aren't you glad that you are not alone on your insanity? ;-) I am going to let my oldest read this post and see if she can figure it out...she LOVES to read(I do too), but she loves books like this one and I am sure she has read it...just want to see if she remembers.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I always love, love, love your blog!!! I, too, will say i knew you when... but my thoughts after reading this post was:"oh I remember when.." A couple of favorite lines from when i was in your shoes dearie!!!
    "insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children."
    and:
    "its amazing you can manage all this and not lose your mind." no the amazing thing is I lost my mind long ago & nobody notices :)
    happy day sweetie, love "auntie" cyndie

    ReplyDelete
  10. It's official... you can now do no wrong. She reads Jane Austen, everyone! I love P&P. I have a beautiful 1950's bound version of eight of her works. It's been a couple of years since I read one, but I watched the movie just a few weeks ago. By myself. No one else around here is too interested.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Cyndie, the reason no one notices that you've lost your mind is because we've all lost ours too, so it doesn't seem strange at all :P

    ReplyDelete
  12. FUNNY!SILLY!CUTE! :P

    Kit-Kat

    P.S.xoxoxo to you all
    P.P.S.yes I really did type this not mom 8)

    ReplyDelete
  13. GREAT post! I was clueless to the book too. I may have to read it now though.
    I agree with Maxine.. we've all lost our minds, so we don't notice you've lost yours! :)

    ReplyDelete
  14. Of all the things I've lost I miss my mind the most! Correction you can't loose something you never had. LOL
    P&P is amongst others one of my favorites and I love that phrase!

    I am in no humor at present to give consequence to young ladies who are slighted by other men. Would you like some cheese with your wine??

    IF life were all sane - even 80/20%
    now what fun would that be let me ask you?

    BORING

    Love Jelly 3 cousin

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for stopping by. Your comments make me smile.